Oubliette
My shoulders are weak
But the pillars don’t care
They sway in the sun
With never a care
Oh Atlas my friend
Give me guidance tonight
How do I withstand
Life’s lengthening blight
As my legs tremble
‘Neath the swelling weight
I struggle against
The sweet lure of hate
Diamonds glisten
Down my frame
I wonder
Are they sweat
Or teardrops
In vain
I quiver in agony
Oh when’s the release?
Please lift my soul
Let it find surcease
Of the rending struggle
That burns every whit
Through the halls of this ego
That wallow in a pit
Deep down in the dark
My own oubliette
-2010-
When I was a Peter
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Peter
 |
| by Spencer Hall |
Sinking in the sea
Water encroaching
High upon me
Cold feet finding
Fathomless depths
Frightening and dark
Oh Savior, thou help
This festering doubt
That had me undone
In my dire need
(I’d lost what I’d won)
Eyes that had lowered
Raised now to meet
The Savior comes
To succor me
Raising me up
I walk in his hand
Confidence sure
And virtue secured
My heart is molded
Whole sweet and pure
-2010-
Abyss
Abyss so full of vacant thought.
An elixir, a balm, a draught,
For me? No, I live in a blight.
With no one but me there to fight
Things that are left in vacant thoughts.
Things that when left begin to rot
And tie you in a great, dread, knot.
And tie you in a great, dread, knot.
They crowd the darkest, blackest night
Abyss so full
This for myself I have not sought.
Look do you see? What's in the pot!
A pot that is dark, deep and tight,
Filled with nothing to face
with might.
A long war waged, a battle fought
Abyss so full
-2010-
The Dream
Flare of colour
Dash of light
A sparkle, a sprinkle
What a wondrous night
The tinkling chime
With a willowy wind
A dance in the magic
Till evens end
The flutists will trill
And warble away
As we join hands
And step this way
Up on the music
That lifts and sways
Breath in the freesia
The gardenia, the rose
Taste the honeysuckle
That here and there grows
And when you wake
Upon morn's breast
The dream you dreamed
During your rest
Will give you your heart
In an audible sigh
And you will remember
That heaven was nigh
Goodbye
There is another side
There is light beyond the veil
So why do we cling so desperately
To life ephemeral
The other is more beautiful,
Pain a memory small
And yet to see one on,
We weep to see them go
No happy farewells do we bid
No joyous songs to sing
We regret the day they go
And wish them back again
My Time
Why am I tired? You say?
When I drag my butt to the door
I do in the morning for him
And in the afternoon for her
On the weekend it’s their turn
And the evenings are yours
The night is all I have for me
And the morn comes too soon
-2009-
A Geo Life
I’m twisting in the torture
Of another’s turbid pain
Who dwells in acute discomfort
With nothing left to gain.
Cling not to the sediment
That weighs your waters down
But be still the soul
And let it filter down.
Oh let your heart be clear
To see the treasure there,
Cease to shed a tear.
Gather in your gems and pearls
See them for what they are.
Oh fester not the current pain
But cut it loose my dear.
Let the fight rise up in you
Be sure your aim is true.
Do not let the Deceiver
Fool and deceive you.
Your gems he’ll turn against you
Tarnish their proud sheen
Shine them up and make them clear
You will triumphant be!
-2009-
Static
Nostalgia, sweet sadness
Lingers over my skin
Like the soft electricity,
What gathers before a storm
That raises the fine hairs
There along your arm
And up and down your spine.
Sweet ambrosia
That lingers long after
It is swallowed
Like a warm ball of fuzz
In your stomach
But like clouds
You cannot grasp it
The more you reach for it
The more it slips away
The Feast
Once upon a time
The storytellers say
And happily ever after
Keeps nightmares a bay
But do you read
In lines unwritten
The truth of the story
The words that are hidden
I will tell you a story
Of times beginning
And worlds to end
Song in the summer
Cry in the wind
Tale of woe
And whisper of joy
The message unfolds
And memory hold
Spinning the melody
Whorls and lines
Tasting its flavour
Will you come to dine?
The feast I lay
For you to partake
Won’t you fill your cup?
Or laden your plate?
Sup upon it
And you will find
You’ll have your fill
Both heart and mind
-2009-
Daydreams
Quiet dreams
Dancing through my thoughts
Linger here
Tiptoe there
Wake me up
A silent prayer
-2009-
Ambrosia
Sweet sadness
I savour it
Like a rare nectar
Tantalizing my tongue
Loathe to let it
Depart my mouth
To the pit, my stomach
I try to hold it
Long as I can
But time works its ways
Slowly the compulsion grows
To swallow
Ambrosia departs
Like a fading dream
An aftertaste lingers
A memory, a ghost
Now it is gone
Left in its place
A dry taste
Contentment
VI
Poison drips
Like glistening
dew
From sour lips
-2008-
Monochrome
A wraith or a ghost
Am I so insignificant?
As I walk through the crowds
I feel disconnected
Their eyes slide past me
Gaze through me
I do not exist
I am grey
I am monochromatic
I blend
I disappear
Why am I here?
Maybe I’m not
I feel so unclear
The Beacon
As one creates a candle
Slowly dipped each day
Again and again into the wax
Life molding the form as it may
One hopes it has given balance
One hopes it has given strength
And through the layers of love and pain
The work is finished you pray
Then one sets it free on the lily pad
Of life’s tumultuous sea
A light for the world
Its storms to brave
A beacon of hope
A light to save
And someday it will come back
Washed upon the shore
It’s light may be out but not broken
It will light again once more
-2008-
Mundane and Redundant Things
The mendacity of these tasks I see
The monotony of redundancy
Over and over the litany plays
Of what great purpose do I do today?
An echo from the recess of the mind
Out of small to great
Are things sublime
A little here a little there
Creates a bond of love shared
A mountain climbed as a team
The progress shared by small feet
And when we arrive
I will reflect
And see with gratitude
Mundane and redundant things
Gift
His beautiful eyes
His chin, his smile.
A marvel of perfection,
And a grace within.
He runs up
With open arms
I love you
Upon his lips
My cup runneth over
I treasure this gift
I pray that I return it grown
Multiplied from what the Master has sown
Palace of Peace
I enter in and peace enfolds
I leave behind a world of care
A soothing balm as I partake
A gift of love in truth’s form
Working so my soul can find
The solace for which
It yearns and pines
And only finds
When in the work for others
Of like heart and mind
The time draws nigh
For even this place
Has not, eternal grace
Yet time spent here
Has given me
The strength I need
To fight the foe
My respite now ended
My resolve more hardened
I venture out
Into life’s rose garden
Scars are left
Where thorns pierce the soul
They rip and tear
And but for the beauty
There would be despair
And
also knowing I can once again
Enter in where peace enfolds
The balm of Gilead
To heal my pain
The beauty of truth
Greater far than the rose
Life Masterpiece
A pause
A break
The music lulls
The silence
Gives a subtle definition
And so too
Our lives
Like the symphony plays
The tempo increases
The instruments in forte
The cymbals crash
Then a moment of stillness
The softness of piano
Picks up where
Forte left off
And life in its whirlwind
Plays and plays
All types of rhythm’s
Loud and soft
Quick and slow
With moments of stillness
The beauty unfolds
Not bar by bar
Nor measure by measure
But as a piece
The whole
Complete
IV
Energy
Exhibited before
me
Oh, how I wish to partake
-2007-
His Charity
Service
Done for me
Regular, mundane
I could choose to believe
It should be done
His share of the load to be sure
But love and gratitude show me
His heart is pure
-2007-
V
Quiet moments
Alone
My thoughts stretch on and on
-2007-
To Fill My Lamp
A drop of oil
For every act
Can fill my lamp
Though every day
As my need grows great
My oil I use
So every day
I need fill my lamp
Drop by drop
With every act
-2006-
One Man’s Love
One man’s love
Strong and steady
Constant
No fickle flutterings
No frustrated falterings
No dreams of freedom
An abiding desire
Unselfish, devoted
Always trying
Happy, passionate
Never tiring
Never faltering
Never complaining
Kind
Quiet and true
One man’s love
Winter
Bright sunlight
In a tight blue sky
Reflects off the snow
And blinds the eye
Glittering ethereal
Cold beauty pains
No love to be given
In these lovers lanes
Broken
It can bear the cold no more
It has wept dry silent tears
The tree shudders in the wind
Breaks from within
Containing the pain no longer
The rending tear
Is echoed across the distance
Maternal
Kisses so benevolently bestowed
Are like barbs in wire
That catch and hold
What is this power
That binds so close
And tears and shreds
When pulled there forth
-2005-
II
Sun shines softly
Through the window
Warming my face
-2005-
III
Snow glitters
In bright specks
Across the meadow
-2005-
I (Need)
Too tired
In the face of
adversity
I lay down to rest
The Box
Stories
Tales
Memories to hold
The letters
And cards
We write
Are gold
To tell of love
And tears and joy
Of pain and sorrow too
And in the end
To tell of life
And all its points of view
Close
Don’t touch me
Don’t hold me
Don’t put your arms around me
Just let me lie beside you
In the pale moonlight
Our Garden
The garden was given in love
And each tender plant that is nurtured
Grows up toward the shy above
With love, returned to the garden
The fruits of loves labours are seen
With each fruit flower and leaf
With each bee and bird that sings
So our life is like a garden
A tender labour of love
We choose to nurture each other
Like the warmth from the sun above
And so as we care for each other
As gently as were we a rose
We walk through our garden of life
As our love for each other grows
-2001-
Departure
The roses upon which I lay
Have thorns, which pierce my soul
The happiness I finally found
Was unexpected and short
Like a fresh water spring
After the desert
But having a thin oily taint
So when you go to drink
You taste sweet bitterness
And afterwards, delayed pain
The bittersweet knowledge
Of how we felt.
That time would not allow
Two loves to be complete
Stays with me continually
The pain being unbearable
Is also my source
And thriving on it
Day and night
Keeps it an open sore
But one I would not have healed
The pain reminds me of the love
That for one short time I’d gained
And that in remembrance
Is what I’ll think on
And will forever and a day
-1994-
The Door
Through this world of dynamic minds
We all go out to explore and find
Hostile environments that we meet
Turn hearts cold and frost our feet
Even though it may seem wrong
If we survive it will make us strong
We walk around and no one sees
The beauty within you and me
Trivial. Is the way, some thing are sold
Even though their worth’s untold
We try our hardest to get back in
And feel the warmth we know is within
But even though we’re worn and sore
We’ll never get back
‘Till we find the door
The Dance is Over
The dance is over
No one sings
The bottles are empty
No wine to drink
The music’s been stifled
They’ve all gone home
And I’m still left here all alone
Gone home to their comforts with swimming
heads
Swimming with joy as they sink in their
beds
Gone home to the comfort
They’re surrounded with friends
That they will see them
When the night ends
Well, I’m alone here while everyone’s gone
And I’ve been told that I must move on
I have no choice
It’s a one-way trip
If I voice my opinion
They’ll probably flip
So I’ll leave the dance that I’ve grown to
know
I’ll leave the dance that I’ve grown to
love
And be as brave as I possibly can
Be brave so I can learn
A brand new dance
The Rose Beyond the Wall
A rose once grew for all to see
Sheltered beside a garden wall
And as the days passed swiftly by
It spread its branches straight and tall
One
day a beam of light shone through
A crevice that had opened wide
The rose bent gently toward its warmth
Then passed beyond to the other side
Now you who deeply feel its loss, be
comforted
The rose blooms there, its beauty even
greater there
Nurtured by God’s own loving care
Paradise
Drifting of into troubled dreams
Luring me to its source
A beautiful light is to be seen
And my heart seemingly soars
And angel robed in purest white
Shows me thing
That I feel are right
I meet people who call my name
And I respond with theirs
Have I met old friend all but forgot
Or are these newly gained
And in this enchanting place
I no longer feel ill at ease
The light continually warms my face
I simply feel an everlasting peace
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